Friday, September 7, 2012

Keeping up with the Joneses

Apparently it's true. I'm a horrible mother. Or at least that's how I was made to feel last night while I was sitting with a couple other moms at my daughters gymnastics class. Why am I so horrible? Because I only have my daughter in one gymnastics class per week instead of two or three like the rest of them.

Ok before you condemn me too let me plead my case. I'm a single mom. Just a secretary. I dont earn a lot. I have a mortgage and car payment along with all my other bills to pay. And those classes are not cheap! Plus she does take ballet one time per week also. I don't want to burn her out. She's only 3.

Ok I know I'm not a horrible mom. But talking to these moms made me realize how much parents pore themselves into their children's lives. They go overboard with everything. Their child has to be the best, wear the best. Every little girl in her class wears a different outfit each week. My baby has two and one of those does double duty as a ballet outfit.

While I was sitting their trying to tune out the two moms trying to one up each other I looked up gymnastics leotards on eBay from my phone. Wow! These things aren't cheap even used. I don't know about anyone else buy I see these all the time at yard sales. Kids either grow out of them or get bored with the sport and off to the yard sale in they go. I have always passed them up in the past but not anymore. Certain brands sell better so I'm going to have to do some research. But they are usually about $1 when I see them at a yard sale so I will pick up even the lesser brands. I can always put them in a lot.

As for my daughter she is a happy loved and well rounded little girl. Far cry from a year and half ago. And I think I'm a great mom. And she is the most awesome Princess ever.

9 comments:

  1. TOTALLY agree with you, mom! They don't need to be in everything! I think it overstimulates them and they need some "down time" - in our family, it's been "choose ONE!" - that's it. Don't let those others make you feel GUILTY! Great title to this post, too - DON'T TRY to keep up with the rest of them - for all you know, they are 3 feet under with debt coming out the wazoo! You do what you can with what you have. If your child is loved, clean and fed, the most important needs are met! We didn't get to do any extra activities growing up (there were 8 of us) as my parents couldn't afford it. Well, let me tell you - none of us have been harmed at all from not being "popular" - one is a doctor, one a PhD, one a chemist,...blah blah blah. So you just keep on loving her and doing the best you can do! She'll love you regardless!

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    1. Susie - My parents didn't have a lot of money when we were growing up but they always had time for us. It's sounds like you had wonderful parents and did a great job with the eight of you.

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  2. Good for you!!! Kids need down time to be just that...kids!!! I'm even a worse Mom than you. LOL I have 3 boys and they haven't been in any extra curricular activities yet this year. Eeek. Do I feel bad. No, not at all. What sucks is that I always feel I have to justify our lifestyle to other people. The thing is that we are not big into sports in our house. We are more of an outdoors family. We go fishing, hiking, camping, and for long walks to nearby forest preserves. We go exploring. We cook together. We have a large garden, we have chickens. My husband breeds canaries. We only have 1 TV in the house and it's in the living room. We just choose to live a simpler life...this is what I feel is best for our family. Now if my boys want to participate in a sport, we will certainly encourage them.

    I feel a new post coming soon on this topic..LOL

    Margaret @ Live Like No One Else

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    1. Forgot to mention too that when they do want to participate in an activity, we only allow one at a time as well! ;)

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    2. Margaret can my princess and I come hang out with your family. It's sounds like you have wonder times together. I think family time is what you remember when you grow up. Not what you wore or how many things you had. Your kids are very lucky to have you and your husband. One thing I've learned from getting my princess through foster care is how many kids don't even have the basics like love.

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    3. You sure can...come on over. ;)

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  3. She is loved and you are a fantastic mom from what I can see. I feel bad for the kids whos parents don't have a life outside of their children. So much pressure! Oh and my daughter always wore preowned leotards to dance. In gymnastics she wears a leotard but sometimes shorts and a tee if its a practice. I always pick up leotards and ballet/ tap/ jaz shoes at garage sales when I see them. Great sellers. Oh and if you want to talk pricey kids sports outfit look up ice skating leotards. Yikes!!

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  4. Veronica,
    My daughter was in competition dance for a few (too many) years. Oh the costs were so ridiculous! Lessons, costumes, shoes, hotel rooms...it was 3-4 thousand a year easy, but it was the only thing my daughter was doing at the time and she enjoyed it. As she got older, the costumes started getting a little more revealing and Las Vegas like. When she saw they were going to make her wear a pink high cut costume with feathers on it, she said no way and quit.(yay!) Then she took up a martial art called Aikido which was wonderful. One outfit, no shoes and only $70 a month. It did wonders for her inner self. She's not into anything now except honing her digital art and animation skills. Once in a while we force her to go outside and see the sun. lol. She is her own person, does not follow the crowd and, if something is trendy, she usually hates it. She's not a girly girl and never will be, but that's okay. Just let your daughter be who she is, love her and encourage her to be an independent thinker and she'll be just fine. You will too. ;-)

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  5. My daughter is in a ballet/jazz class twice a week, but that's it. No other activities because it is crazy expensive! I bought her dance clothes on ebay and have been keeping my eyes peeled for them at thrift stores ever since. They totally retain their value even when used!

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