I'm In a Rut

I started selling again on eBay almost a year ago. At first it was exciting. Everything I listed was auction. When I got a bid I would almost jump up and down for join. I have certainly lost that loving feeling.

I began selling the way I think most people do. I went around my house and got rid of things. I had a goal in mind (a new Iphone) so I was highly motivated. Once I reached that goal (much quicker then I was expecting) I had a new goal. I need to get my doggies fixed. That is one of my doggies on my profile picture wearing the cone of shame. The goals continued and so did the selling. I started looking for items to sell at yard sales and thrift stores and often got lucky.

I remember coming home from Savers with a bag of little toy figures. I had no idea what they were but for a couple bucks I was excited to find out. I opened the bag and after some research found out they were called Battle Beasts and they sold for $36.00. Not one of my biggest sales but certainly one of my favorites.

Since I began selling I have gone from selling mostly kids clothing, to toys, to jeans, to woman's clothing, to plush and now I'm selling mostly men's clothing. There is no guess work in it men's clothing. I know what brands to look for. I know about what they will sell for. No excitement.

How do you keep going every day? Do you ever get bored? Feel like quiting?

She's the reason I won't quit. I don't want her to ever need for anything. So off to measure some jeans and list more products I go.

Oh on a very positive note, the adoption papers have been sent! Hopefully my Princess will really be mine before the year comes to a close.

My Princess

My Princess is the love of my life. I will admit she is slightly spoiled. But I've waited and wanted her for so many years that I go a little overboard sometimes.

You see I can't have children. My ex and I figured that out after trying for many years. I was very sad and discouraged. But after a lot of tears and praying I finally realized that even if I couldn't have a child that didn't mean I would remain childless forever. There were lots of children who need some one like me.

I started the adoption process in OC. But after my ex and I separated I moved back to Salinas. It took me a while to settle in to my new life. Once I was settled my family encouraged me to continue trying to adopt even if I was single. I was apprehensive at first. But after a lot of discussions and praying I decided to try again.

The process from orientation to getting a child took a year. Mostly because in the middle of the process I had to put it on hold to find a home for us.

On January 21 I received a call that there was 20 month old little girl. I was given the details about her family and the reason she was removed. I agreed to meet her the next day and fell in love on the spot.

This has been a difficult process and it's far from over. When you try to adopt a child through the county you are a concurrent foster home at first. Even though the social services is trying to reunify the child with their parent(s) if they determine that there is a chance the child will not be returned to the parents they want the child in a home where they can move straight to adoption if and when parental rights are terminated. Sometimes a child is returned to their parents after being in a concurrent home for an extended period of time. I know couples this has happened to and its heartbreaking. Unfortunately its a chance you take.

We go to court next month for my Princess and the social worker is recommending termination of parental rights. Part of me feels bad because I'm "taking" (or hoping to take) a child away from her parents. But I remind myself that my Princess was removed for a reason and that had nothing to do with me. I want the best for her. And if her parents aren't able to turn their lives around to give her a good home I'm blessed God put her In my life to provide a good life for her.

Relaxing day with the kids

This is what it's all about.

My Babies

People always look us strangely when we go for walks. My Princess doesn't mind sharing her stroller.